Tuesday, December 11, 2012

A dream,



I woke up this morning and moved my feet across the bottom of the bed, waiting to touch that warm curled up chihuahua with my feet. 

"Where is she?" 

A thick world lifts from my bed. I hear the shower running. I'm awake, and she's not here. 

I want to go back. I was dreaming so deep. I saw her inside someone's house, they had the door open. I called her and she came to me. I scooped her up and ran and jumped on a bus. I held her tight and then I heard my name being called. I brought her up to the bus drivers with clipboards that sat at the front of the bus. 

"We've had a call. Miss, is that your dog?"

"Yes! This is her!", I was half excited and half pleading with them to understand. 

"Look, it's her spot!", I outlined it on her chest, and I could feel the light fur under my finger. 

"OH, this is the missing chihuahua," said the woman driver, "I have her flier right here." She flipped through a stack of papers and pulled out a Find Myrtle flier. 

"And, look, she had no teeth here on the bottom." Sleep-Myrtle didn't protest as I ran my finger over her toothless underbite.

"And, if you could just feel here...", I demonstrated by holding her under her arms and lifting her up like Simba in The Lion King. "This is what she feels like." I could feel the shape of her ribcage and the weight of her in my hands. 

They were convinced and they gave me a number to call the next day after I had her microchip checked. I mentally told myself to make that vet appointment as soon as I sat down. She needs to be checked out, too. 

I sat back down with her in my lap. She wasn't excited to be with me, she was just still. I didn't think about that in my dream, but I'm wondering about it now. 

And then, we were home. I was waking up and moved my feet across the bottom of the bed, waiting to touch that warm curled up chihuahua with my feet. 

"Where is she?" 

A thick world lifts from my bed. I hear the shower running. I'm awake, and she's not here. 

11 comments:

  1. I am visiting your FB page everyday.Every single day...hoping&waiting to see the good news. I know that one day I will see such post.... I am praying for you and your baby girl Myrtle <3

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    1. Thank you, Justyna. So sweet of you to think of her every day!! big xo

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  2. Still waiting with hope too. I know it must be harder and harder as the days go on...this brings tears just thinking of how hard it must be. :( Hugs and positive thoughts to you Danielle. I still expect to see one day a huge FOUND message too.

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    1. Thank you, Rose - you are a constant source of love and support!

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  3. I have no words... Only long, warm hugs

    *hugs*

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  4. please, myrtle, find your way home.
    you are so missed and so loved ♥

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  5. wow, that made me tear up.. to feel her so real and it to be just a dream! But maybe this is a sign that you are close--I check your page constantly and even though I am nowhere near where she got lost, I still keep my eyes peeled in my neighborhood. Hoping she finds her way to you!

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  6. Oh how I wish there was something more I could do to help with the search! I am still very hopeful that she will find her way home to you! Big hugs to you!

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  7. Oh my goodness...where do I start? You are a beautiful writer. I am not someone who swears a lot but I think I swear everytime I read something you write about Myrtle (I feel the love, the frustration, the unfairness).

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